There are many times in a person’s life when they feel like a small drop of water in a big ocean. I have experienced this more than once. It is an amazingly incredible feeling when someone can come along and help you break out of your shell and see yourself as God sees you. I know for myself this process is still ongoing but my kids are getting older and it is so fun to see them coming into their own.
Last night my 20-year-old child was baptized and although many things have happened in our lives to keep us apart I was able to be there to witness it in person. I cry just thinking about the promise in his life and the great gift we have been given to be there for each other again. Never again will he be the 10-year-old child I last remember but today he is a new adult in Christ and is destined to live out the calling in his life.
When I say my last memory of my child is as a 10-year-old and now he’s 20 that is because due to situations beyond our control the last time I saw my child was 10 years ago. A couple of months ago we found each other on Facebook and started talking, finally agreeing to meet in person. it was one of the best experiences of my life! This person who was once very shy and helpless and dependant on others is now tall and attractive and strong! he is bold in his faith and wants to shout of the great things Jesus is doing for him from the rooftops.
It has been a great experience and one that has made me think and pray A LOT! 😉 Our relationship with God isn’t any different. He sees us with the potential we’ve been given and not how we are living it out. When we see ourselves as the 10-year-old child he sees the 20-year-old adult he has created and fashioned in His own image. He is not disappointed with the decisions of the past (as long as we repent) only excited about the Hope for the future!
I too am excited about the future! For the first time in 10 years I have all of my children serving a powerful and loving God and I know their lives will be extremely blessed!
I’ve been doing a lot of writing lately and I find it to be quite therapeutic. Most of what I put on paper so far is either for personal use or in hopes of compiling a book. I must say up until now the idea of a blog held a lot of fear for me. To be raw and open for everyone to see and have no control over it is pretty intimdating….BUT today I am working past the fear! Today is a new day and it is the first day of many to come that I will do my best to not let fear play a part in my life! The first thing on my list to conquer is this blog!
It is my prayer that through this blog you are able to see how God is working in my life and in the lives of my family. No one is perfect and we are all works in progress but I am striving to be better and with God’s help master my weaknesses. (The good Lord knows I have a lot of them!)
Yesterday I lost a friend to cancer. He was very young with 2 young sons still in school. This was the second friend I’ve lost in a month and even though I know they aren’t in pain anymore it still is hard. There are children missing their father’s, mother’s missing their son’s, and wives missing their husbands. What can be said to these families at a time like this is almost inconceivable to me. To find a comforting word or a consultation that hasn’t been used to death is an impossibility in my own strength and mind. the only comfort I can draw at a time like this would be from God. He guides my words and actions to know when to speak and when not to. Does it still hurt? You betcha! But I can only imagine if I were in their position how little I would want to hear “He’s in a better place”, or “The Lord’s will is at hand”, or “I am so sorry! I can’t imagine what you’re going through”. Of course you can’t imagine! You should thank God for that everyday! To the families of my friends I say know that you are loved! Know that however short their stay on Earth these men shared themselves unselfishly! They loved and they lived and they would want you to do the same! Take great pleasure in that fish you catch or song you play and know they are watching and are so proud!
So to my friends Brett and Joe I say I love you and I miss you and…You better rest up because when I get up there we are going to party so hard we shake the gates of heaven!